“It’s not about checklists in relationships. I fell into that trap though. When I was in the military, I would come home and apply my work mentality to my personal relationships. My relationship with my ex-wife suffered because of it. Learn to tune into your emotional body. That will give you power and you’ll find tremendous benefit in your relationships. ”
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Why Listen:
My guest today transitioned from the Air Force into high tech in Silicon Valley, where he has worked in Product Management at Intel, Trulia, Realtor.com and other great companies. He also wrote a book about Product Management, where he takes the principles around procedures and checklists from the military, and applies them to the functional role of Product Management.
However, beyond our discussion of Product Management in this interview, there are two things that I absolutely loved about my conversation with GS.
First: side hustle. GS made the transition to the Real Estate industry. While his day job was building tech products for the Real Estate industry, he leveraged what he was learning to start investing in Real Estate as a side hustle. The result is that, over the course of his career, he developed side income that has allowed him to transition into more meaningful work around coaching and writing. This is a wonderful example of how - outside of the workplace - listeners can cultivate a hobby that creates the financial freedom to pursue a deeper purpose in your next chapter.
Second: relationships. In the 300+ episodes I’ve done so far, we’ve only talked about relationships in one other episode, and that is the recent episode #323 - Conscious Leadership, with Floyd Carlson. It’s something we should talk about more. For those of you who are in relationship, I’m sure you can relate: when my relationship is off with my wife, Rebecca, everything is off in my life. I’m not as productive at work, I’m not as focused in my conversations, I’m not able to operate at my peak potential in my professional life. There is not this clear distinction between work and life… they blend together, and one affects the other. In his work with couples, and in his recent book, “The Masculine in Relationship” GS brings some very poignant advice to how listeners can improve and deepen their relationship. I know, I know, this is a podcast ABOUT career success… trust me on this, you can have success in your career without success in your relationship or family, but it’s not much fun.
I met GS through the men’s work I’m doing with John Wineland, and it was a pleasure to get to know this professional side of him in our conversation - I hope you enjoy it as well.
About GS:
GS is a coach who helps men in relationship develop their Masculine core. He is a former Silicon Valley executive, founder of a tech company that he eventually sold, and the author of two books (including the recently published “The Masculine in Relationship”). His teachings are based on 12 years as a student and creator in the realm of the Masculine-Feminine dynamic, and also pull in principles from a variety of fields: psychology, martial arts, tango, meditation, and BDSM.
After his time as a military officer, GS got his MBA from the University of Virginia and transitioned into the high tech industry. He spent time at Intel, Broadcom, Trulia, Realtor.com, and Matterport. He also founded and sold the company CityStash, which sought to disrupt the $23B self-storage space with technology.
Check out his website: http://gsyoungblood.com/
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Partners:
Have you ever wondered how you could become a more effective and balanced leader? Or how to find a team with a high degree of trust that performs at a level you’re accustomed to? Check out The Leadership Podcast where they study what makes the best leaders tick - including many who have moved "beyond the uniform" to reach new levels of success and fulfillment.
Selected Resources:
Transcript & Time Stamps:
4:30
Joining me today from Menlo Park, CA is GS Youngblood. GS is a coach who helps men in relationship develop their Masculine core. He is a former Silicon Valley executive, founder of a tech company that he eventually sold, and the author of two books (including the recently published “The Masculine in Relationship”). His teachings are based on 12 years as a student and creator in the realm of the Masculine-Feminine dynamic, and also pull in principles from a variety of fields: psychology, martial arts, tango, meditation, and BDSM.
After his time as a military officer, GS got his MBA from the University of Virginia and transitioned into the high tech industry. He spent time at Intel, Broadcom, Trulia, Realtor.com, and Matterport. He also founded and sold the company CityStash, which sought to disrupt the $23B self-storage space with technology.
5:30
What was your transition out of the Air Force like?
The transition was scary. It felt like leaving a cocoon. I had known the military my whole life. But the transition was one I needed to do based on my aspirations. I decided to go to business school to ease the transition and arm me with a baseline set of business skills.
6:30
What lead you to product management?
I stumbled into product management. When I was getting my MBA, I had no idea what I wanted to do. I spent a lot of time exploring various options but none of them really resonated with me. But then I started learning about product management and that really interested me.
Product managers are people that own all aspects of a particular product. They make sure the product is something that will meet market standards and that all departments within the company are aligned on bringing that product to market.
Product managers do a little bit of everything and are working with everyone from engineers to marketing specialists. You need to be able to influence without necessarily having direct authority.
I think my military background made me very attractive to employers because of the leadership skills I had the opportunity to develop in the Air Force. I would encourage veterans to weave those narratives into interview situations.
10:50
Can you tell us about the book you wrote?
It’s called System Not Circumstance. I saw companies that were achieving success but as they grew, they would struggle. I became fascinated with think of ways companies could continue their success even as employees rotated in and out.
To write the book, I drew on the checklist culture of the military. Everything has a checklist. I think a lot of that comes from the fact that people at units are constantly rotating in and out. So the checklists are a way to maintain institutional knowledge. I wanted to apply some of that to the corporate world.
13:05
Can you talk about your transition into real estate?
I worked in the technology sector after completing my MBA program. What I didn’t like about that job was that it lacked a people element. So I wanted to transition into real estate because there was more of an opportunity to interact with people. At the same time, it was an industry that was begging to be disrupted by technology. So I took a job with Trulia which was a great experience. As a company, we were able to bring technology to real estate in various ways.
I initially got into real estate as a side hustle. If you have the time, having a side hustle can allow you to explore different passions or interests that you’re not able to explore in your full-time position. As I got into real estate, I saw how you could bring data analysis to real estate in some interesting ways. It’s easy to get in over your head with real estate so I spent a ton of time doing research before I decided to make the transition into real estate full-time.
19:15
Do you have any other advice for people looking to build a side hustle?
You’ll almost never get financial freedom working for someone else. You really need to build up passive income on the side to gain financial freedom.
Another piece of advice I would have for people transitioning out of the military is to build your business skills. At one point in my career, I wanted to transition from product management to product marketing. I took free courses through LinkedIn and other learning platforms. I was able to build up my skills that way.
I also advise people to develop a side hustle while you’re working full-time. That will take some of the pressure off making the side hustle successful immediately. You can take the time to develop it in a smart and strategic way.
22:20
Can you tell us about your new book The Masculine in Relationship?
I coach men in improving their relationships. You can have a better relationship. It’s not inevitable outcome that your relationship will become flat and boring.
Men can start to operate in the world in a way that will improve their relationships. I encourage men to access different resources out there that will help them in this area. My book offers a three part blueprint through which men can see the world and then develop the skills to improve the way they show up in the world.
There’s a phrase I use in the book “You may or may not be the problem but you can be the solution”. You need to stop focusing on what other people need to do. Instead focus on what you need to do to change and improve. That idea is a core theme of my book.
Military life can be hard particularly with deployments and their impact on families and relationships. So I really recommend that military families get access to relationship resources. Work on your relationship just like you would work on your strength in the gym.
33:00
Are there any common relationship issues that you see?
Relationships aren’t about just getting things done or a checklist. I was extremely driven in the military and then I would come home and act like I was still at work. My relationship with my ex-wife suffered because of it. I advise people to learn to tune into their emotional body. That will give you power and you’ll find tremendous benefit in your relationships.
My first book was focused on getting things done in the workplace. I completely shifted that for my second book. That book is much more focused on how to get the most out of your personal relationships.
36:30
What was the book writing process like?
It’s a lot of work. At the same time, it can be a great credibility builder. It's also incredibly easy to publish your own book on Amazon or other platforms.
37:40
How long did it take you to write your books?
Each one took about 6-7 years. But I was working full-time and raising kids so I was writing the books on the side.
39:19
Do you have other resource recommendations?
I just want to reiterate that people use online platforms to their advantage. There are so many valuable resources out there.
40:10
Is there anything else you’d like to share with listeners?
I would like to thank all military members for what they do. If you choose to stay in until retirement, that’s amazing. But if you choose to go a different direction, don’t be afraid. But get yourself prepared so that you can make a smooth transition.